‘Yellowstone’ star Wes Bentley reveals the love from Heath Ledger that changed his life | CPT PPP Coverage

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Yellowstone‘s Wes Bentley breathes life into the character of Jamie Dutton in Taylor Sheridan’s hit cowboy drama, and the actor is as vulnerable in his real life as he is on screen. In interviews with various publications over the last several years, he’s opened up about sobriety, past challenges he’s faced, and the friendships and bonds that helped him through some of his darkest moments.

Opening up to Men’s Health, Bentley shared that his friendship with Heath Ledger was the first time he felt unconditional love in his life, the kind of love that allowed him to make mistakes and still want what was best for him.

The pair became friends having filmed The Four Feathers together, and what bloomed between them was more than just a co-worker type of acquaintanceship; they developed a friendship that would go on to change them, so when he heard of Ledger’s passing on Jan. 22, 2008, he wrote it off.

“I denied it. I was like, ‘Yeah, of course that happened.’”

Bentley explains that he continued a drum solo in Rock Band before heading out to find more drugs, brushing off the idea that Ledger’s death could be a reality at all. He didn’t want to think about it; he didn’t want it to be real, so he indulged in things that kept his mind from considering the possibility of his life changing forever, of facing a life-altering loss. When it came time to go to his memorial, Bentley couldn’t do it; he wasn’t in the right frame of mind mind.

“I tried to go, but I was really messed up, and I felt like that wasn’t right. So I got out of the cab on the way to it. And that sits with me forever.”

Bentley says he believes Ledger would have understood, because the bond they had surpassed anything Bentley had ever known. “Only Heath. That guy loved me. Outside of my family, I’ve never felt love from…” Bentley had to pause and take a moment to reflect before continuing to say he’d never felt love from someone like Ledger before.

“He didn’t care what I was, or what I was like, the stupid things I was doing. He just wanted me to be better. I always thought of him as a brother, and I wish I could’ve given that back.”

Hindsight is always 20/20, but with the compassion that Bentley talks about Ledger with, it goes without saying that Ledger felt the same love from him. A friendship with space to see the highs and lows of life, to acknowledge the moments in which each would stumble and fall, and to help build one another up in the dark moments.

Bentley says being upset about Ledger’s death is something he allows himself, and the depths of his sadness now is only possible because of the depth of his love for Ledger, even after his untimely passing.

“I’m an actor. I’m not afraid to feel things. And it doesn’t make me feel worse. It makes me feel better. Because I know I love him, and I did love him, but what I’ll take from that relationship is: You’ve gotta show people now that you love them every day. Even when you’re mad at ’em, even when they’re wrong to you…tell ’em you love them because it means more than you know, to you and to them. And I didn’t do that well enough with him.”

The interviewer said that, before making his following statement, he let out something between “a sigh and a sob,” obviously pained that he couldn’t get sober while Ledger was still alive. You can tell that Ledger’s death was a changing moment for Bentley, one of those pieces of his story that turned everything around.

“He even begged me to get sober in an email. The last email, he was beggin’ me. I didn’t, at first, but later, getting sober, I’d think of that email all the time. One from him and one from my dad, begging me to get sober.”

Bentley is sober now and has been for a number of years, and a point of reflection for him comes from looking back at that time, a time he calls “the fire,” and acknowledging everything he lost there. While Ledger isn’t here to physically walk with Bentley, it’s obvious that the love they shared can’t be altered by death, and Bentley carries that with him through every single day.